No.80 - Boris Attempts the Biggest Confidence Trick in British Political History.

Dear James,

Do you really think that people believe all this? Despite all the careful rehearsals, the ham acting, the assurances of inevitable success, the hesitancy, the ‘misspeaks’ and the constant flow of lurid allegations against Boris, the Big Lie goes on. Choreographed by Mr Cummings, your sorry band of ministers parade before us pretending that they will magically reconcile the irreconcilable i.e. obey the Benn law to extend Article 50 if no deal is forthcoming and yet, in thirty one days, leave the EU no matter what. It is one of the biggest confidence tricks in our political history and most people know it. 

They all know their lines. Everyone is in step. Robotically reasonable Gove says that we are leaving on October 31st. Softly blushing Raab and ‘doormatt’ Hancock repeat the same. And behind the scenes, anonymous advisers hint that there will be riots on the streets if the people’s will is denied. A perfect storm of anxiety, resentment and anguish is being created while we watch. And yet on Saturday, in a drunken late night party at the Tory Party Conference, someone recorded Boris in a not so confident mood. Amidst raucous bar room cheering we could hear him asking, ‘Am I fighting a losing battle?’ No, roar the crowd. ‘Am I right to use military metaphors?’ ‘Yeah’, shout his supporters. ‘Am I right to stick to my guns?’ Yeah, Yeah, Yeah chant his adoring followers. But these are not the sounds of a confident PM. They are the sounds of a man craving reassurance from a group desperately trying to boost his flagging morale. Your government is all show James and most of the country knows it. 

Yesterday Sajid Javid, your new Chancellor, was on the radio. He was asked, Do you know what the plan to avoid the Benn Act is? He hesitated and then said, ‘I think I do.’ The poor man is in as much of the dark as the rest of us.  He has no idea. Plans are the areas of Cummings and Boris. Surely, you don’t expect Boris to share plans with members of the Cabinet? Whatever next? 

At your Conference, the banners say, ‘Get Brexit Done!’, a policy predicated upon the view that Mrs May was weak and a closet Remainer and that Europe will bend when faced with a ‘strong man’ offering the prospect of a no deal if they don’t come to heal. Mr Johnson pretends to be that strong man. He prefaces each sentence with, ‘I think what the public want to hear is…’ He claims that he is speaking for the whole nation when he is not. His government pretends progress. It pretends a plan. It pretends seriousness. But it is all huff and puff designed to bring about a final no-deal, followed by a blame game accusing the EU of being recalcitrant, inflexible, confrontational and arrogant. Which, of course, will be a severe case of the pot calling the kettle black. Every hour makes it clearer that is all part of the Boris/Cummings great game. And every hour shows that it will end in tears for them both. Everyone knows it James. Everyone except you?

Later in the week the PM was forced into denying that he had groped two women at a ‘Spectator’ event twenty years ago. Charlotte Edwardes, a journalist with the Sunday Times, is sticking to her story.  Meanwhile the story of Jennifer Arcuri, one of Boris’s more recent bimbos, continues to gain momentum. Three trips abroad and thousands of pounds of tax-payers’ funds gathered way above her natural pay grade. But Boris denies everything. He follows the command, ‘Hit back, Hit hard, Never apologize and Never explain!’. Pure populist. Pure Trump. 

Last week in New York, those terrible twins grinned confidently at the world, implying that they were together breaking the mould. That same day the Senate initiated impeachment proceedings on the President regarding his attempt to pressure the Ukrainian President to investigate the son of Trump’s presidential adversary by withholding $400m of arms sales.  Shortly afterwards the Supreme Court in London announced its earth shattering verdict on our own Prime Minister causing Boris to flee the scene to come home to answer a parliament that had never been prorogued. 

Only the gullible will buy these charades James. But that is the secret of the confidence trickster. He plies his trade through the confidence of his own sense of impregnable self-worth supported by the clever appropriation of normal language to anaesthetize the vulnerable. Our country was made vulnerable by the 2008 financial crash and by the Tory Party austerity programme which followed it. That same party now has the audacity to say it has the solution to the problem that they created. In other words, it is attempting to visit upon us the biggest confidence trick in our political history.

Fortunately, the majority of our nation is intelligent and wise enough to see through the charade. Your party is about to be found out James. 

Time to get out that life belt? 

Kind regards, 

BH - Your Concerned Constituent.